Spennyriver is a small town deep in the heart of the Midlands, UK. The Spennyriver Dispatch is the local paper bringing you all the local news, keeping you up to date with all the happenings in this strange town.
It’s like a regular town with regular people. Just weirder.
In today’s issue…
‘Mr Charity’ does it again!
Once more, our resident charity fundraiser has hit the headlines with his charity work, this time raising funds for the Spennyriver Children’s Hospital.
Eric ‘Mr Charity’ Sweat, has just completed a gruelling schedule of 25 marathons in 25 days and has raised well over £15 for this good cause. Although Eric started to fall behind his self-imposed schedule within the first day, he went on to complete the amazing feat in just an under ten months. The Dispatch was able to catch up with Eric as he crossed the finish line, just 300 days after he started. He had this to say:
“It’s proper good that I’ve bin able to mek sum moneh for a good cause. I’m led to believe that the hospital are gunna spend the moneh on a set of felt-tip pens, as the set they have needs replacin’.”
We asked for more clarification as to why his 25-day schedule turned into a 300-day endeavour, somewhat taking the shine off this monumental achievement.
“Well, when I set out to do this, I had no idea that Marathon had changed its name to Snickers. I had originally planned to eat 25 chocolate bars over the course of 25 days. How was I to know that a marathon was also a running challenge? So basically the 300 days was me looking for chocolate for 3 days, then 297 completing the marathons.”
We asked him how it felt to run so far, and how much training he had done:
“Most of mi training was about eating chocolate. I dint* really do much running, which is probably why it took mi so long.”
We also quizzed him on the route he took for this challenge, and to name some of the amazing things he must have seen along the way:
“Well, I started in Spennyriver town square, and headed to Derby. I’d picked Derby cos it’s 26 miles from the town square. I basically ran there and back non-stop for 300 days. Although, when I say 300 days, what I mean is I did it once, then caught the bus back and forth 24 more times. I was fortunate enough to catch sight of Bardill’s Garden Centre one time, I also saw the swimming baths and I passed the amazing road works on the A52. I’m probably going back there for a holiday.”
When presented with the cheque for £15.72, the hospital spokesperson had this to say:
“We can’t thank Eric enough for all his efforts. This money might make a child very happy, well at least if they like colouring.”
For more info on Eric’s upcoming efforts, call the hotline on 0111-GET-SWEATY.