Spennyriver – The town that’s NOT Nottingham – Lexicon

horror stories spennyriver

Something a bit different today.  I would like to introduce you to the wonderfully strange world of Spennyriver.  It’s a small town deep in the heart of the Midlands, UK.  It’s like a regular town, with regular people.  Just weirder.

Just because I am from Nottingham (a medium sized city in the East Midlands, UK), do not assume that this is where I draw my inspiration.  Spennyriver is purely fictional and is in NO WAY Nottingham (although the people here do speak like those in Spennyriver).

The Spennyriver Dispatch is the local newspaper bringing you all the breaking news and keeping you up to date with what’s happening there.

The Spennyriver motto:

One day in Spennyriver is probably enough.

It makes sense to introduce you to some of the local dialect to assist you with understanding some of the locals.  See how well you can do with translating the following phrases.  Cover the answers before you guess.  If it’s not immediately obvious, try saying it out loud.  It helps.

  • Ay up mi duck – Hello
  • Aya goreny onya? – Do you have any with you?

  • Ta – Thank you
  • Gerron coursey – Get on the pavement
  • Gizza luk – Could I have a look?
  • Tintintin – It isn’t in the tin
  • Aya gorra cob on? – You seem to be a bit moody
  • Arkatchoo – Have you heard yourself?
  • Ee diddit is sen – He did it all by himself
  • Oo worrie wi? – Who was with him?
  • Ee w’by is sen – He was alone
  • Ittim wiya Poss – Hit him with your handbag
  • Al gerrit mi sen – I will get it myself
  • Ee dint aveny – He did not have any
  • Ee tode er to gerrout on nit – He asked her to go away
  • Ya gorrote? – Do you have anything?
  • She gorraway wi it – She got away with it
  • Norratall – Not at all
  • Sheeza gud gell – She is a nice woman
  • Gizza fag – Could I have a cigarette?
  • Ya mashin? – Would you please make me a cup of tea
  • I’ll mekkit forya – I will make it for you
  • Gerraway wi ya – I don’t believe you
  • Gerrout on nit – Go away OR get off
  • Worra these? – What are these?
  • Where worree? – Where was he?
  • Wotsupwiya? – What is the matter with you?
  • Lukatt messyamade – Look at the mess you have made
  • Arkatem – Listen to the noise they are making

Hopefully by now you have a handle on some of the lingo.  Try this conversation and see how you get on with the translation.  I would say drop your translations into the comments, but that would spoil it for the next person. Post in the comments if you translated it, then email me your description of what’s happening (authorsteveboseley@gmail.com).  I’ll send a FREE short story to anyone that gets it correct!

Here is the conversation:

John:  Ay up mi duck.  Ya mashin?

Tracey:  Why don’t yer mekkit ya sen?

John:  Arkatchoo!  Aya gorra cob on?

Tracey: No.  Av just give up fags, that’s all.

John:  Right.  We’ll if y’ain’t mashin, I’ll mekkit mi sen.

Tracey:  Ta.  I need fags, mate.  Aya gorreny onya?

John:  I ain’t gorreny on mi.

Tracey:  Gerrawyay wiv ya.  Gizza luk.

John:  Gerrout onnit.

Tracey:  I saw ya wi aah Peggy. Dint she av any onner?

John:  Sheeza gud gell, but she dint av none onner.  Just ga down shop and gerrem ya sen.

*******

I’ll start dropping some of the headlines from The Dispatch into these blog posts.  Hopefully they’ll raise a smile.

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